Emotional Dump Journal

This should be the first thing on this website, but it's the last because I added this section a few years after making this a live site.  And I want to stay true to my real journey, in chronological order.  

Things with sleep have been overall great, if I don't sleep one night (or two) I don't worry, knowing my body will do its work naturally. 

But a few months ago I had trouble for more than a few days.  Checked off all the boxes on this site, but still, I was tossing and turning with thoughts coming a hundred miles an hour.  I spent an entire night just thinking about all the things bothering me (it was more than usual).  When one thought came, the next one.  It didn't end.  I felt so emotional weighed down the following day and needed to feel light again so this particular thing would stop interfering with my sleep.  

So, I decided to write about it. 

I wrote. A lot. Once I started I could't stop.  Writing down my feelings helped me with a few things.  It helped me understand my feelings, in this case it was a lot of hurt and anger.   Once I did that, it seemed to open up space for me to start feeling some compassion for those I felt had 'wronged' me and (surprisingly) as things started to shift more into focus, I started having compassion for myself and came full circle.  

That exercise cleared so much dirt for me. I didn't solve it (won't happen - dare I say - overnight :), but what I did do is have a place to park my feelings and know I had access to them to give myself the much needed room to sleep.  

Writing was like going on a journey to get my closer to my truth.  A professional therapist who might be reading this might be going, "Well yeah, duh!"  I know this is like the first advice people give - to write about it - but like everything else, I have to experience it myself to understand the value.  I've written my feelings down before, but it had been a while and when holding so much emotional baggage was affecting my sleep, I had to take action to avoid a relapse.  

So, I realize after this experience that everything else I said on this website, all the advice, things to do, are amplified...if you can clean up from the inside first (which mainstream therapist calls 'journaling' :)  

(credit:  All mental health professionals out there! :)